My Great Big Cock Fight

Originally published on: 27/02/2011

Before you start getting any dirty ideas, let me point out that I am referring to a rooster. Nothing else. My Great Big Rooster Fight sounds lame, okay? If you’re reading my blog, you can deal with my bad titles.

I felt that I ought to have a non-judgemental post, so here it is. I’ve tried.

This happened shortly before my second birthday. I hardly remember the incident, but I’ve heard about it several times from the parents and I have strong faith in my imagination, so I consider it an important landmark in my life.

My grandparents’ house was filled with people doing their own thing. At one point my grandma heard a cry from the street outside and asked my mother if it was me, but mom was sure that I was inside the house.

A few moments later, the doorbell rang and there stood the watchman from the neighbouring house with a little kid in tow.

(Yes, I often looked like a boy when I was little. Fortunately that has changed. (I also used to be really cute. Unfortunately that has changed too)

The man told my mom that I got into a fight with the neighbours’ rooster, after which I was taken into the house.

Mom: Where else did you hurt yourself ?

Me: Nowhere.

Then out came my story

(Yeah, I was smaller and less suspicious, and therefore the victim)

That was one of the biggest adventures I have ever had. It also gives me an interesting story about my childhood. I pity all the people who only did mundane things like eating mud. (I feel even worse for kids these days. They’ll probably tell stories like “How I Got *ridiculously high score* on *popular video game*”)

However, I would strongly advise everyone to never mess with a bird.

P.S. – In one scene from the finale of Modern Family Season 1, Cameron says to Mitchell, “One time a rooster attacked me and my mum wrung its neck and we had it for dinner”. I’m rather glad to report that no such thing happened with my rooster.