Why We Need to Stop Buying Souvenirs - Receiver's POV

Presents are nice. Or at least they have the potential to be nice. Some of the worst presents I got were souvenirs from other countries. Of course, many people have brought me lovely things from their travels, but more often than not, people buy junk. The problem is they usually do this with the best of intentions.

"Here's a piece of crap from another continent to remind you of the time I went to Paris and you didn't" -Demetri Martin (possibly paraphrased) on souvenirs

Giving people souvenirs can be a pain for many reasons, some of which I've mentioned before. We may not like to admit it, but sometimes, receiving them can also be inconvenient. A lot of gifts are one or many of the following: large, heavy, ugly, useless.

Here's my rating of some commonly gifted souvenirs:

Let's break it down. To keep things objective, I'm assuming all these things are aesthetically pleasing.


- Keychains

This is nice at first. A keychain is not too big (hopefully) and it sure is useful. But how many does the average person use? Two? Maybe three, at the most. The keychains that follow become awkwardly-shaped items which take up precious storage space - a big box or even a small shelf.


- Trinkets/ lockets/ earrings/ charms

Very hit-or-miss depending on how well the buyer knows you. On the plus side, if you think something doesn't suit you, you can always gift it to someone else who is more likely to use it.


- Chocolates

If you're the kind of person who thinks all chocolate-like items are delicious, then hurray, you'll never be disappointed. But you'll probably be a terrible chocolate gifter who genuinely believes people like Bounty.
I've had a couple of people bring me amazing chocolates, but I've also had enough Hershey's Kisses and Ooty chocolates for life. And if I never see a Bounty bar again, it'll be too soon.


- Magnets

Unimaginative, but safe, neutral, and not bad at all. You don't have to worry about storage space, and you can use them to hold up notes on your fridge. The best ones are also functional as bottle openers, tape dispensers, thermometers, hooks, and other things. Also, if you're a parent with kids who announce before bedtime that they need a magnet for an experiment in school the next day, you just yank one off the fridge.


- T-shirts

Unless you've bought it at a proper store (and sometimes even if you have), a souvenir T-shirt is, most likely, made of the worst kind of material. But let's assume it's good material and the right size for me. I'm still left thinking, "I've never been to Los Angeles. Do I really <3 LA? What if I don't? You <3 LA because you went there and saw what it's like, and maybe I would <3 it too if I were in your shoes, but I don't really know, do I?" 


- Models and showpieces - the worst kind of souvenir

All they do is take up space and prolong your dusting routine. And the ones that are made of plastic or metal won't even 'accidentally' break.


- Something you supposedly asked for - the most disappointing kind of souvenir

I believe people should enjoy their holidays without worrying about what to bring back for everyone. But when they keep asking you what you want and say they'll get you something anyway, you might as well try to ensure they bring something you like. So you tell them to bring you XYZ if they happen to see it but to not bother hunting for it because you really don't need more stuff.
    
Then they bring you PQRS because it happens to vaguely resemble XYZ. And PQRS will be something generic that's easily available everywhere around you at half the price they bought it for.
And you have to pretend you're excited and grateful when all you're thinking is, "Oh, you poor dumb fools... I hate it!"

Related story: 
On a visit to someone's house, the host had bought coffee and made me some because she knew how much I love it. Problem was, she was a tea drinker with no idea of how coffee works. I took a sip from the mug she'd given me and all I could taste was weirdly tainted water with a grainy texture.

Extremely puzzled but curious to solve the mystery of the suspicious liquid, I took a couple more sips before realising that she'd put coffee grounds into the mug and mixed it with water the way you'd make instant coffee.
I then tried, at various points through the evening, to leave the mug in an obscure corner of the house, but she'd always find it and say, "You forgot your coffee. Here it is."


- Postcards

Please don't give me a new set of postcards even if I stare at them and keep talking about how pretty they are. I may love looking at them, but they take up space because I don't know enough people who will truly appreciate getting a handwritten postcard in the mail.

If you find a pretty one while you're travelling, write on it and post it to my address. It'll be the best souvenir you can get me.
Or you could simply come back and share your stories with me. Just please, please, please do not bring me Bounty bars.

Why We Need To Stop Buying Souvenirs - Giver’s POV

So you're on holiday and you want to pick up a few things for your folks back home. If you want to, that's perfectly fine, but it’s not something you have to do. Here's why:

- People are not entitled to presents because you went travelling. 

Especially those who don’t even tell you what they want but still expect something, because then you're saddled with the additional task of magically guessing what they might want.

(Also, unless you're a little kid or someone I'm very close to, it's not cool to ask me what I've brought for you. In fact, being greeted with that question makes me want to give your gift away to someone else.)

- The actual process of buying souvenirs is a headache

So, you see a souvenir store and decide on buying everything in one place. Should make things easy, right? Ha ha, you wish. Here are a few of the multiple muddling questions you'll have to consider:

• What kind of gift do you buy? 
• Something useful? 
• Something nice-looking? 
• Something thoughtful? 
• Something unique? 
• How much money are you willing to spend?
• Should you bargain?
• Whom do you buy for?
• People you like the most?
• People who will appreciate your gift? 
• People you interact with a lot? 
• People who give you lots of things? 
• People who will sulk if you don’t bring them something?
• How much space and weight allowance do you have?

Even after all this careful consideration, it's possible you might leave out someone you really wanted to buy something for.

Where does it end? (Rhetorical question. It doesn't.) In the spirit of keeping it simple, I suggest you don’t even start.

- You’re there to enjoy your holiday

Yes, it's too bad your friend couldn't join you on your holiday. Yes, it helps that you know exactly what they'll like from [place you're going to]. This doesn't mean you should feel compelled to go out of your way to buy it, even if it has been specifically requested.

Sure, you’d love to make someone happy by bringing them what they want, but it shouldn't be at the cost of your peace of mind. By all means, ask where one gets [requested object] and look for it wherever you go, but don't plan a trip to someplace miles away or to a shady neighbourhood just to obtain it.

If you completely forget or simply don’t want to bother, that’s fine too. If s/he if a true friend, s/he will understand. You've most likely spent a lot of time, effort, and money on your holiday. You deserve to enjoy it.

Receiving souvenirs can also be messy business, but that is a matter for another post.  

Presents?

It's that time of the year again when almost everyone is anticipating presents. And I can't think of presents without thinking of this scene from 30 Rock:

For those of you who didn't want to wait for a video to load (although that's a short clip totally worth watching) this is basically it:

Dotcom:    Hey Trey, we just picked up your birthday party invitations from the printer.
Tracy:        Wait, What is this? "Give to charity please. No presents."?
Dotcom:    Yeah, that's what you told me to put on the card.
Tracy:        No Dotcom, I said "give to charity? Please, no! PRESENTS!"

Haven't you wondered why people talk about the two things like it's an either/or situation? You have people who spend absurd amounts of money on things they don't need (although anything must seem practical after the gifts baby Jesus was given) and others who act like they're sacrificing everything by buying stuff for less fortunate people instead of for themselves.
However, cynical optimist that I am, I like to think it's because awesome people don't talk a lot about their presents or how much they're doing for society, or both.

Christmas to me usually means music and food and family. The whole wrapped presents under the tree affair doesn't excite me much, partly because we don't have a tree and partly because I like to get presents when I need them. We're not a family that gets new clothes and stuff just because it happens to be festival time or someone's birthday. Besides, I have very specific and limited wants that no one seems to get. Presents never happen.

Okay, that's not true; we get presents when we get presents, and the more unexpected the timing, the better. I was simply thinking of one of my favourite lines from James Valentine's Jumpman series. It's been several years since I read it, so these may not be the exact words, but it went something like this:
The past is gone, the future is unknown, and the present never happens.

This character in the book explains how, for example, when you consider the idea of the present being now, by the time you've said or thought "now", it's already in the past. Like you're reading this now. It's already happened. Mind-blowing, come to think of it.

So, Christmas is upon us and I shall enjoy it. Doesn't matter that I won't get a present. Not presently, at least. Or now. Or now. Well, you get the idea.
Have an extraordinary merry Christmas!

Trouble With Presents

I'm back after a couple of weeks without internet! It's Christmas, which is the season for presents, whether you like it or not. I won't go into that now, though, because this post is not really about Christmas presents. This is one of those stories I've heard enough times from my mom to imagine the situation, though I don't actually remember it happening.

My cousin and I were partners in crime when we were little, but we also fought a lot with each other. Whenever one of us got something new, the other would be given something almost identical, but different enough for us to fight over them.

That may not have been the exact scene, but you probably know what I mean.

Once my aunt decided that she should give us both the exact same thing so there would be no reason for us to fight. We both got necklaces and, sure enough, found no reason to fight over them.

It made us rather unhappy, and we came up with an ingenious plot to solve the problem.

All we had to do was break one of the necklaces...

...so that we could fight over the other.

The good thing about having your own blog is that you don't always have to make a valid point. However, if there's any message this post is supposed to be giving, since it's Christmas and everything, it's probably this: don't damage your presents or fight over them, unless it makes you happy. Bazinga! 

Merry Christmas, everybody! May you get great presents, have fun, eat as well as I did, and be happy. Also, happy holidays to those of you who are lucky enough to get long vacations.